Its our fifteenth anniversary! We dated for six years before we got married...an awful time that was. It was once Jesus changed our lives that our life really began. We committed that we would put God first, then each other, then the children...radical, I know. There have been lots of ups and downs, especially with having five children in the last twelve years! We have both learned so much about each other and ourselves and the journey is far from completed.
There is a question that we often ask each other, but in the way one would ask because they truly want to know the answer. "What can I do to change that would make you happy?" We have found that in the last few years, the answer is the same, "Nothing." Are we perfect? No. I think it is more an awareness of the others needs and making changes that have just become a subconscious part of the way we treat each other. I view my husband as an extended part of myself and since us as humans are selfish and want only the best for ourselves, I want him as happy as he makes me. This in turn, then flows to our children.
There is the occasional arguement, but more like a dicussion. Are there times that I get frustrated with him? Certainly, as he does with me. The way I handle this is when I feel this way, I stop and think if there is something that I'm doing wrong, am I just being emotional or petty? Then I always think about the intent behind what he says or does...that usually ends things right there. I know he loves me and as humans we often say the wrong thing, so instead of yelling and getting angry, I just ask him if this was his intent? Never has there been a time that he has said yes. I never expect him to read my mind and I tell him if I need something or if I'm upset. I also remember to tell him how much I appreciate all he is to me.
By God's immeasurable grace I have been blessed by His gift of our understanding to humbly change and grow for each other.
It helps that my knees still feel weak when he kisses me...